Pushy TTC rider, congratulations, you are my daughter’s mom now

Congratulations, it’s a girl!

Fellow TTC rider, because of your perseverance and determination in ensuring you separate my daughter and myself on public transit vehicles, mission accomplished, you’re her new mom. I hope you use the same strength to push me out the subway door – out of fear that I may sit down before you have – in ensuring she bathes regularly and eats her vegetables. That look of determination, when you see her 60 pounds in front of you, which simply CAN NOT BE, will surely show itself once more when filling out field trip forms and making out her agenda scribbles. The way you avert my death gaze after you dig your shoulder into my rib will come in handy when you pretend not to hear her many wants and needs in every frickin store you dare enter. Good on you for practicing your faux shocked expression when people call you out for being an asshole, it will come in handy when teachers say the same thing about your newly adopted bundle of joy. And the way I hate you now, as you shove between myself and my daughter, is only a fraction of how society will treat you as a single parent. Ride on douchebag, ride on.

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