When my older sister didn’t want people to know her baby names right away, some people laughed: “That’s so silly, they’re just names.” Except they’re not.
For some reason people are absolute jerks about what other people name their kids. When I was pregnant a lot of people let me know they hate the name Patience- though at no time did I ever ask them what their thoughts were. “What will the kids say?”
“They will tease her!”
“They will make fun of her because it is already a word!”
Now Patience is in school, no one has teased her. And moving to a bigger city in a neighbourhood where it is common to have an uncommon name (ya) hasn’t made a difference in this, as some try to justify their former protests. Even in the snobby suburb we lived in for a bit, no one made fun of her. Yet, I’m still asked if other kids make fun of her.
I don’t get what the big deal is. In my case, Patience isn’t a new name at all. In the cases of others, who cares? So the kid won’t have someone in their class with the same name. OH NO they won’t be referred to by their first name and last initial. How dreadful!
It should be said that now, all the Patience haters can’t see her being named anything else. It’s as if I’m the smartest woman in the world or something.
What do doctors have? Patients! Ugh, It makes me SO sad that people are giving these type of names to their children! Think about it a name is a serious thing! I don’t even wanna imagine what the kids at my school would do to someone named Patience! – A Behind the Name commenter
Then there is the last name fun. My daughter has a hyphenated last name. We were in a news story last year and the photographer who came over got huffy when I spelled her last name out, “Oh, you’re one of those. You couldn’t just lose your name.” No, I couldn’t. I had my name changed from my biological father’s to my mother’s. This name is very important to me, it is a part of my family history, and my daughter is a part of that history. Also, it is a very pretty last name. As for her last name being longer, again, so what? We live in a country that is supposed to be open to different cultures. We aren’t all going to be Jones, Smith and Harris (Fun fact: The latter was my former last name.)
I am particularly sensitive to words and names. So I’m not one to simply ditch a name so important to me.
But what if she gets married to someone with a hyphenated name and they will have children? WHAT WILL BE DONE?! I don’t fucking know. I don’t. But for some reason, I also don’t fucking care.
It seems super fun for people to become self-righteous about other people’s kids names. But there are so many other hobbies out there – give them a whirl!
I write other stuff too! Check out HillaryDiMenna.com