Not my child!

Drinking? Not MY angel.
Drinking? Not my angel.

I get it now. The satisfaction of saying, “That kid is bad,” and it not being about your own. Cruelty? Instinctive? No, I believe I’ve cracked this nut to find the desire of any parent: validation.

While a mother I am close too openly complained at my daughter’s birthday that the kids were out of control (because they preferred face painting to the games she suggested) her son was running around hitting the other party guests. Partygoers were five and under, and I love the aforementioned boy and didn’t care about his antics.

It made me wonder. Why was his behaviour OK when my “undisciplined” parenting style was critiqued when the gossipers were at church?

I’m an easy target. You know what, that’s cool. Every mother, despite her parenting style, feels insecure. We are our biggest enemies at times, a well-known fact.

What satisfaction must come when you can look at another child and think to yourself, “Glad they’re not mine!”

If my presence can offer another that five-minutes needed to feel good by getting lost in the world of shaming another, I’m happy to cooperate. It feels good. And in the end, as lovely as all your children must be, I’m glad they’re not mine too.

Mine is perfect for me.

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3 thoughts on “Not my child!

  1. Oh me too. I used to be all about blaming the parents. Karma gets back at me though. I once stood in line at Value Village with Patience freaking out beside me, ringing all tantrum bells and whistles, because I wouldn’t buy her a couch. What a two-year-old needed a couch for who knows, but sure enough people disapproved of my resistance!

    There’s a hilarious video I linked to in my new post that has Louis CK talking about it. Not sure if you have the same sense of humour as I do but I love it lol

  2. I so get this. Pre-children I used to judge all the time. Now, as a parent I have been in that position many times where people are probably thinking gee she has her hands full or glad that isn’t my kid. My older son is very “independent” and “high energy”. He has embarrassed me many a times with tantrums, colourful language etc. and I know for a fact that my parenting style doesn’t condone that behaviour. You can only do so much as a parent. The other half is entirely the kid. I applaud parents who stay strong and don’t appease demanding children just to avoid embarrassment. Now when I see other moms struggling, I sympathize rather than judge. It is a hard place to be in that’s for sure.

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